


Moonlight wanders

by griffinpuffgirl



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Drabble, F/M, Memories, Past Relationship(s), Regret
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-13
Updated: 2019-01-13
Packaged: 2019-10-09 11:22:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17405996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/griffinpuffgirl/pseuds/griffinpuffgirl
Summary: Morgana takes a walk in the moonlight, and remembers all that she lost in the past years. A boy with sparkling eyes, a sister, a prince with a good heart, a serving girl with a cursed destiny, and a tyrant.Perhaps she was more like Uther Pendragon then she thought.Perhaps she wasn't.Perhaps it didn't matter.- Doesn't have to be read as Mergana, can be just seen as friendship -





	Moonlight wanders

The moonlight danced through the trees, gracefully falling around Morgana like a cloak. All was silent, even the birds had quietened in her presence. She didn’t know if they were afraid, or respectful. The forest used to be so full of life, when she’d walked through it in times long passed, walked with a boy with sparkling eyes, who gazed at the natural world with eyes filled with awe. Morgana had tried not to think of him, but last time she had seen him, his happy figure had been weighed down by such a grotesque sadness, a sadness that clung to every fibre of his being. His eyes did not sparkle so brightly, but were haunted, much like she suspected her own were.

 

Oh, what war took from them.

 

It had been painful, to glance upon the young boy and see such sadness. He had helped her once, and Morgana had sworn to him that she’d never forget it, never forget how he had put himself in the line of danger to save her and the druids. But as her throat constricted and she gasped for air, all was forgotten. Morgana knew they could never get past that.

 

She didn’t think she wanted to.

 

Morgana had seen a war in her dreams, a war waged between herself and Camelot, fought on Camlan. The war was imminent, but yet, she did not find herself yearning for blood as she was when she killed Uther. No, she found herself walking alone in a moonlit forest, feeling everything but anticipation and elation. There was a soft tugging of regret pulling at her heart, and Morgana tried to push it down, but it flared like fire. Throughout her conquest to Camelot, she had seen no freedom, no hope, no hope for this wretched world.

 

People were scared, more scared than they’d been in even Uther’s cruel rule. It felt like the stories told of the purge, families torn apart, graves filling the fields.

This was never what she wanted, she wanted a world where magic could be free, free to help those in need, free to be expressed, as it should be. She never wanted a war. _This is what Morgause wanted_. Morgana pushed the thought away, and continued through the woods.

 

_I can see deep into your heart, and it’s cold, cold as stone_

 

Oh, how she hated Gauis’s haunting words, even if when he said them, he was a goblin. How she feared that he was right.

_I fear you are more like Uther than you realise_

Queen Annis had been wrong. She was nothing like Uther. _Or was she?_ No. She wasn’t. She only wanted what was rightfully hers, freedom of magic, the throne to Camelot, a new age. Annis just didn’t understand. She was too soft.

 

_I will not rest until all of Camelot bows before me._

Those very words had come from her lips. She had spoken them with icy determination, and now the war was coming, she would have Camelot.

So why did she feel so lost?

She knew what they would say, the serving girl would say that revenge is not the answer, the prince would say that she should stop, stop fighting, and the boy with the sparkling eyes would tell her that she was feeling guilty, and she should come home.

 

But they were wrong. This was not revenge, this was the work of the high priestesses, freeing magic was like breaking the world from chains, it was not something so petty as revenge.

The prince was too soft, his reign would last. It was hard for a good man to be a great king, there were sacrifices that had to be made.

The boy with the sparkling eyes was wrong too, she was not guilty, she should not have to hide who she is. He didn’t understand, she couldn’t come home.

 

Morgana gazed up at the moon, the battle would soon be over, and her heart was heavy.

Maybe she was wrong.

Maybe she wasn’t.

But she couldn’t stop.

It was too late.


End file.
